A Teenie Oldie Newbie Takes the Helm – PSC Sailing Report

Sailing Solo: Facing the Fear and Finding the Fun

I am a control freak—fiercely independent. After years of crewing, mostly on yachts, and latterly with Stacey and Alex, the time has come to try sailing a dinghy entirely on my own.

Bless them, Stacey and Alex have tried again and again to get me to helm their double-handers, but the responsibility? No way. You’re not going to see what an idiot I am! 😜 I’ll do it—but only if I’m alone.

This morning, as Alex rigged up a club Laser with a 4.7 rig and the wind whipped around the field, it all felt like a terrible idea. Was fun meant to feel this anxious? Everyone reassured me—it was perfect conditions. No swell. Good direction. Personally? A Force 4 felt about 3 forces too much. The force was not with me.

Tack, Twist, Contort—Repeat

“This is how you tack—push, twist, quick yoga contortion, overarm hand swapsies—look up, straighten up. This is how you slow down—sail out, speed up – sail in”. Honestly, it all seemed impossible. It felt just like learning to drive—so many things to remember, to coordinate. Alex was about to witness the worst possible version of Clare!

A reach off the beach—doable. The sail in and out, faster and slower—that worked. But gybing? Absolutely not. So, I came up on the wind, thought it through, and pushed the tiller away.

Holy moly—why does it happen so fast?! My arm doesn’t bend that way, everything is in the wrong hand, and why is the tiller five metres long? 🤥 Wouldn’t a steering wheel be a good idea?

The Boat Had Other Plans

After a few more tacks, I stopped overthinking and just went with the flow. Which sort of worked—though 1/10 for form. The Laser got me…

I’d been warned about the mainsheet getting stuck on the transom. And it did not disappoint. Nothing terrible happened. I recovered, sailed with it stuck—until I tacked, and then it was stuck again on the other side. 😧

But that was it. I was maxed out on anxiety and adrenaline. “The boat is trying to kill me—I’m going in!” I shouted at Alex.

But I knew…. If I went in now, I wouldn’t go out again.

Big Girl Pants On

Deep breath. Big girl pants firmly in place. I came up, went upwind, tacked some more. And—actually got some speed. I wouldn’t say that I was in control but my heart rate settled a bit. Finally, I returned to the beach. A calm state of mind. A gentle reach. A proud husband on hand to land me.

I don’t understand what just happened but I guess you lot do. I think I want to do that again……. 🤔

Clare x